I recently received a post from the Gottman Institute. I liked it and have
decided to share it with you.
It's called
The Grass is Greener.
In any
interaction, there is a possibility of connecting with your partner or turning
away. One single moment is not
that important, but if you’re consistently choosing to turn away, then
trust erodes.
When this happens, you begin to focus on your partner’s
flaws. You forget about their traits you admire and value.
Eventually you
start making what researcher Caryl Rusbult calls “negative comparisons.” You
start to compare your spouse to someone else, real or imagined, and you think,
“I can do better.” Invest in your marriage
instead. Express appreciation for each other. Brag about each other’s
achievements. Say “I love you” every day.
The grass isn’t greener on the
other side. The grass is greener where you water it. (And even if the grass
looks dead, it may still be possible to restore it to green, if you water
it.....)
If you are interested in reading further about how to "water the
grass," go to
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